if i show you a picture on my phone, do not SWIPE. ain’t nobody tell you to take a motherfucking tour.
I’M GONNA BE OKAY I’VE GOT PEOPLE WHO LOVE ME EVEN WHEN I DON’T REALLY DESERVE IT I’VE GOT THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO AND PEOPLE TO LOVE AND DOGS TO PET AND RAIN TO LISTEN TO AND I’M GONNA BE OKAY WE’RE GONNA BE OKAY
You know how many times I’ve called my mom a bitch or a hoe in my life?
Not one goddamn time what the fuck is wrong with these kids
"no pain no game." i whisper as i break my sisters leg while playing twister
In the scene where Sean starts talking about his dead wife and her farting antics the lines were ad-libbed by Robin Williams, which is why Matt Damon is laughing so hard. The scene took everyone by surprise. According to Damon in the DVD commentary, this caused the cameraman to laugh so hard that the camera can be seen moving up and down slightly.
Don’t date someone you wouldn’t own a dog with
This is like really sound advice though
does anyone else feel like they just lost their favourite uncle